Questioner: Who won the 2020 Presidential election?

Respondent: I did but the outcome was false – “the big steal.” “And everyone knows it.”

Q: What happened at the Capitol January 6, 2021?

A: Patriots tried to prevent the illegal transfer of governmental power.

Q: Can a President, any person, be infallible? Make no mistakes, be the smartest man in all rooms who doesn’t need advice or briefings from others, can correct the Pope’s theology, etc.

A: “Yes.”

Q: Does your past illegal actions, both court proven and alleged, bother you?

A: No. I am totally innocent and have been acquitted from all the charges. All fake news from a horrible, liberal news outfit.

Q: Does “anything is fair in love and war” include politics?

A: Yes, it’s a war out there. The Supreme Court said I can do anything as President.

Q: Do you believe in the Unitary Executive Theory?

A: Again, absolutely. I am the President of the United States and I am in charge of the Executive Branch. Members of the Executive Branch report to me. They work for me. If something is not written “illegal,” it is in the President’s authority to do whatever, acting as President. There are no such things as traditional “norms.” I also control the Republican Party and GOP legislators

Q: Is politics, government, and life based on transactional exchanges?

A: To believe otherwise is for stupid suckers. Acquiring power and wealth are my goals. You help me and I’ll help you, that’s how business is done.

Q: What is more important, competence or personal loyalty?

A: Loyalty trumps competence. My former Fox News laden Administration is loyal to me.

Q: Is there a human hierarchy?

A: Absolutely. Look at the places from where “they” came, places fit for animals. It’s imperative they be deported;. We do not want them here, especially in positions of authority. They must stay in their place.

Q: Isn’t America a mosaic, a melting pot, and isn’t that our strong advantage?

A: My supporters, most people, believe America is a white nation, a Christian nation. They believe in one nation, one religion. They elected me twice, three times, actually. My party supported my elimination of USAID and I support states’ gerrymandering and stringent voting rules. Most people support my anti Diversity-Equity-Inclusion policies.

Q: Americans are celebrating our 250th Anniversary. How closely does your Administration coincide with the values of the Declaration of Independence?

A: Wrong question. Stupid question. You are stupid and ugly. The right question is “how well does my Administration reflect and meet the present needs. Things change. The stock market is record high and there are more wealthy people than ever. We are the greatest and wealthiest country in history, This has never been done before.

Q: Why the emphasis on re-building the White House and building the Trump Arch with tax dollars now with so many people hurting? Plus we were told private donations were going to pay for it.

A: During my first term, I said the White House was a dump and I decided it needed to be upgraded, something more appropriate for the most powerful man on earth in which to entertain.

Q: Does the financial struggle of the working citizens, the non owners of stock, those with poor retirement and medical coverage plans, the renters, those unable to afford post high school education for their kids or childcare and those who work lower paying service jobs, and the many young people who see a bleak future – most Americans, concern you. Your campaign promised them quick solutions. You gave them hope for something better.

A: Look, I just said “America is great again” and I don’t care about the people’s financial situation, even a little bit. I have an Iran situation to deal with” — May 12. Besides, my voters are more concerned with transgender sports, the Ten Commandments in classrooms, and banning books. This affordability thing is one big wacko, left wing, fraud.

Q: Your go-alone, aggressive, and militaristic foreign policy is troublesome for us and deadly for others – Canada, Greenland, Venezuela, Cuba, Ukraine. Do we have a treaty with Iran?

A; “We obliterated Iran’s nuclear and military.” We have an agreement.” “Iran wants badly to have an agreement.” “Obama’s Iran Treaty was the most terrible ever. We are going to correct that.” “Iran refuses to agree.” “I have ‘red lines’ that must be included.” “Where are our allies – we don’t need allies.” We don’t have a treaty.” I am tired of this.

Q: How did your Iran attack, tariffs, tax cuts for the wealthy, soaring national debt and rising interest rates, record high gas prices, cut back on financial and medical programs for lower income families, deportation of Green Card workers Make America Great Again?

A: Trust me. Everything will fall in place in about two weeks.

Q; AI is changing everything and more major changes are coming. The Pope issued a warning. Business and scholarly people are concerned. Your policy allows free rein for the handful of AI controlling individuals. You mentioned change, this is a major change but there is no Administration reaction. Why not?

A: They are good business people. They like me. They support me. The Washington Post (Bezos) altered its editorial leaders and political op ed. CBS (Ellison) yanked Trump critic Colbert and blew up “60 Minutes.” I like Michael Dell and his stock. Others donate money. I support them.

Q: There have been concerns expressed about the effects of your advanced age, sleeping during meetings, late night social media texting, and your physical and mental health declining. Your response?

A: I have not changed. I am the person I have always been. I am a strong leader. I am meeting my goals and I am deserving of the Nobel Peace prize.

Q: Does “honor”, not as an award, but as a personal attribute remain among our governmental leaders?

A: Honor is honor.

Q. Regarding your Administration’s release of information, we know more about UFOs

and aliens than we know about Jeffery Epstein. Why?

A: Jeffery who?

Q: Your Administration is reputed to be our nation’s most corrupt. Is it?

A: No way. I cleaned up Beijing Biden’s swamp. I run the government as I run my businesses. Sometimes the two interface. I make shrewd financial deals and my Administration and family seize opportunities as they come.

Q; The 56 signers of the Declaration of Independence pledged their “fortunes, lives, and sacred honor” to our independence from authoritarian King George III and the ideal of “all are equal under the law” in a representative democracy. Is this still the foundation upon which the United States remains grounded or is this part of the “changes” you mentioned? You are sliding toward authoritarianism and authoritarians.

A: “Some people may like a dictator.” “I would like to be dictator on day one.” My actions are based on my beliefs.” “Watch what I do, not what I say.”

Q: Looking at your policies, the suicide rate is inordinately high among ICE detainees being held without habeas corpus and legal rights. Does your ICE have no empathy? Your prolonged bullying, and curtailing energy/power to, Cubans is heartless. Your administration is more focused on 2020 personal retribution instead of the 2024 promises to those who voted for you. Do you feel shame for not fulfilling your part of the transaction with voters. Have you no shame?

A: Shame? I never feel shame. Nor regret. This interview is over. Nap time.

Thank you Mr. President. I appreciate your taking time from your golf to talk with me.

Don Scott is a North Warren resident.